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Sex toys are not competition for your partner, and using them to get off doesn’t make you any less capable of cumming. Make sure your sex toy drawer is stocked with the buzzy gadgets that do it for you, and don’t be afraid to incorporate them into partnered play. Don’t rush the process!) Fire up the toys Penetration feels infinitely better when you’re turned on.” (Emphasis on “aroused”-it doesn’t have to take you only 10-12 minutes to orgasm.
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“I highly recommend taking your time with foreplay, including manual stimulation, oral sex, and using sex toys, as it takes most women 10-12 minutes to get sufficiently aroused. You and your body deserve patience from your partner, and they should want to take their time to make you feel good! “More than 80% of women can’t orgasm from penetration alone,” says Niki Davis-Fainbloom, sex expert for Keepler. Repeat after me: If it takes you awhile to orgasm, that’s okay, do not feel bad. And yet, orgasms are freaking delightful, and if you want to increase your chances of having one (or, you know, multiple orgasms), there is stuff you can do to accomplish your goals (while simultaneously, somehow, still not thinking about said goals!). It’s about the ~journey~, not the destination. So before you and your partner hit the sheets, take a moment to prioritize pleasure and connection over orgasming.”īasically: Cuming isn’t the end all, be all of sex with your partner. “Taking the focus away from the concept of a grand finale can ease your mind and relieve performance anxiety, which, coincidentally, can help you cum. "Acknowledging the fact that orgasms aren’t the sole purpose of sex can actually help you climax quicker and with greater ease,” says Sarah Riccio, queer sex educator and co-founder of. But the first rule of getting there? Don’t think about it. No need to sick to just dildo-in-vagina sex Some partners enjoy the visual of receiving a strap-on blow job too.Anyone who’s ever had sex will tell you that orgasms, sadly, aren’t always guaranteed. "Dildos with curves and ridges like the can offer some variety to the sensations." Then, experiment with different shaped and style dildos, suggests Boyajian. Along the same lines, "you can also try inserting anal beads and having your partner slowly pull them out during climax," says Riel.īecause this position is going to allow the strapped-on partner to enter the penetrated partner deeper and more fully, you might start out with a shorter dildo. If you're the partner in the back, try wearing a butt plug, which will stimulate your anus as you thrust. If you're the partner being penetrated, you have easy access to your own nipples and clitoris, so have at it! Who knows, you might end up having a blended orgasm. "It allows for deep vaginal access while also giving both partners the ability to create a pleasurable rhythm." It also gives the penetrating partner a great view of, and access to, the receivers' booty and back. (Go ahead, show off those back gains). "This is ideal for those who prefer deep penetration," says Boyajian. Seriously, do penguin pose, since this configuration can be tough on tight hip flexors.) Make it even more fun by placing a bullet vibrator in between your bodies to stimulate both your clits at the same time, says Mackenzie Riel, relationship and sex expert with Too Timid, and online sexual wellbeing shop. And if you're feeling even more adventurous, "add a small of amount of clit tingling gel to the outer surface of the vibrating bullet, to drive you both wild," she says. To make it more intimate, the partner on their side can bend forward so that you can be face-to-face. Switch up the angle by having one or more partner prop themselves up on their hand or elbow. Try having one partner lie on her back with her legs spread while the other lies on her side, facing the opposite direction so that she can position her body the way two scissors might. (Related: 6 Facts You Prob Don't Know About Vaginas But Should) How you make this happen will depend on your anatomy, height, flexibility, and preference. Scissoring is any act that involves two people with vulvas rubbing said vulvas against each other. But if you both enjoy clitoral stimulation, it's pretty awesome.
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Thanks to mainstream porn-which has perpetuated the myth that scissoring is the only lesbian sex position (untrue, obv)-scissoring gets a back rep.